Preconceived Notions
I have spent my life being curious. I wondered how things work, how plants grow and how animals behave. I questioned what was over the horizon, under the water or up in the sky. Later I began the most interesting adventure, people.
Not only did I want to experience new places, different climates, plants, geography, foods, lifestyles and people, I wanted to actually see how they really were. I knew my ideas were shaped by movies, television, the news and others opinions. I always suspected these people, places and things would not be what I expected.
I have never been to war so I have no idea what it is like. There are many movies, TV shows and books that portray war but until it is actually experienced no one can truly grasp the reality.
It may be terminal illness, crime victim, prison or arrest, near death or religious experience, child birth, death of a child or spouse, discrimination, bullying, military service, treatment rehab, serious accident or any unique human event be it grief, joy, exhilaration or trauma. No one knows what it is like to be a policeman, middle child, garbage man, CEO and so on unless they actually are one. We get into trouble when we claim to or think we know.
Today many people claim to know much more then they can possibly know. The cock sure attitudes of politicians, media personalities and celebrities amazes me.
Just because you watched a movie or starred in one doesn't make you an expert. Claiming to know how other people think, what they need and how they should live is unfortunately way too common today. In fact it is rarely questioned. In many circles these bias and uninformed opinions are valued and often directly quoted.
I try to take an adventure everyday. The input I can get through all forms of media be it political, religious or a social perspective has an underlying bias. That can't be avoided, is simply human nature. It can be used to manipulate and control or it can just be a bias they are not even aware they have.
I do not criticize people because most don't even know. I do get disappointed when they do know better or are not curious enough to ask an honest question. It is up to us to ask these questions.
I am not more wise or noble, I have had mentors stir this desire that was in me. I believe it is in everyone to want to know what is real and true but many have settled. They allow others to shape their thoughts and opinions because it is easy.
The vehicle I chose to take on these physical adventures was primitive. I chose a bicycle because it is disarming and a curiosity. I was not a threat because it was unconventional. People were curious so it opens doors to conversations. These people were where they lived.
If it was a rich business owner in Maine, a bridge painter in Schenectady New York, pig farmer in Iowa or fisherman in North Carolina, it was a place to learn.
Listening is something I do but I could always improve on but I try to shut up and let other people talk. The way I do it is ask a question like an interviewer. I want to know what people think. They usually think I'm a rock star because of my mode of travel so I get past that as quickly as possible and get them to talk.
I don't debate but I do share opinions. The unwritten rule of never talking about politics or religion is BS. The politics thing is much less important then sharing my faith. It is never my goal to do this but to take it completely off of the table is wrong in my opinion.
I share what guides me and gives me peace and joy. I rarely quote scripture and I totally avoid speaking in Christian-eze.
Politics is a mine field today so I don't initiate those conversations. I will talk generally about my political philosophy. Avoiding any party affiliation can allow the conversation to go deeper. I want to have conversations not win arguments.
The tactics today are to pigeon hole everyone into a political tribe. If I do talk politics I want to know what YOU think not what your political party thinks.
Realizing I don't know as much as I think comes with age. The older I get the more I reluctantly realize this. Interacting with another human being is a unique experience because each human being is unique.
I personally don't think there is as much prejudice, hatred, bigotry and racism as it is portrayed today. Not that these do not exist, I just think from my experience we all suffer from preconceived notions about each other.
These divisions are an advantage to those who want people divided. They say they want unity but many are simply lying.
I usually talk about the "elephant in the room". It gets me in trouble sometimes but I'm willing to risk it. I believe from my investigation over the years people of all backgrounds haven't opened themselves up to take an honest look at the individual not the group.
Conversations and interactions are healing, I have seen it and have experienced it. Leaders, politicians and laws won't solve this and usually make things worse. The curious individual choosing to bypass the BS and interact with another curious individual is the only real chance we have of healing these divisions.
I know I got preachy but this is at the heart of what I learned on my bicycle. This country is made up of 340 million individuals. I haven't interacted with them all but I have interacted with many.
Experiment with this, challenge your preconceived notions in your next conversation. Talk about something real, love, hope, fears, worries, dreams and questions. Listen more then you talk, I'm working on that one.
Set aside your preconceived notions and hopefully let the healing begin. It comes slow but the more people interact the more the understand they share very common human traits that go beyond, race, politics, economic status or religion.
Build bridges first then go for the hard stuff. Mankind will heal from the bottom up, not the top down.
After that go ride your bike........
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