The ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.
I grew up in rural Ohio with an understanding that we should be tolerant toward those who are not like us. It was a community standard even though there were a few narrow minded exceptions. I worked beside people that agreed on very little, had nothing in common other than work and at times did not like each other but we learned to tolerate our differences and achieve our common goals. I thought that was the point, live and let live.
Years later I moved to the city known for it's tolerance, San Francisco. Unfortunately I soon learned the summer of love has been dead and gone for a very long time.
Don't get me wrong I met many wonderful people in my seven years in the city. I did also meet many who brag about being the most tolerant people in America but made a sport out of not tolerating anyone who disagreed with them.
I heard more hatred for people in different parts of the country for how they looked, acted and thought. Ironically most of them had never lived or even visited these places. If they had they were usually slighted by a rude waitress or got a hand signal from a jerk driver. Whatever it was it was enough to label entire regions of the country as bigots and haters to justify their victimhood. Many times it was based only on a television sitcom or a Netflix movie.
As one of those rubes I think most of us caught on to this tolerance thing long ago. Live and let live is pretty straight forward. If you dress, talk and act weird for attention you will get attention. If you are a few pages ahead on the latest woke fad or list of politically correct words don't judge others for not sharing your priorities.
Yes if you look and talk differently we will do a double take. If you are rude and condescending we will react to you like anyone who is rude and condescending. If your whole identity is based around your sexual practices don't be confused if we react with a puzzled look because your sexual practices are none of our business.
The goal post has now been moved from tolerance to total acceptance. This is where we run into trouble because this seems to only go one way.
If a person has different values, beliefs or opinions he can be judged as a hater, bigot, racist, denier or fill in the blank "......phobe". I do not expect the San Francisco crowd to totally accept mid-western opinions and beliefs, but I do expect them to tolerate them. None of their opinions and beliefs need to change and they should not keep them to themselves. I will tolerate their speech and vigorously defend their right to voice it.
I welcome debate about anything, but I won't be forced to agree. I am by no means a victim. There are people who hate me for how I look, talk and think, that is as the Dude says "Like that is your opinion man".
Those things we learned in kindergarten my stuff and your stuff, keep your hands to yourself and say please and thank you. This community thing is made up of many different kinds of people, division is easy but tolerance is how it works.
Waiting for everyone to totally accept each other's differences is unrealistic utopian bull shit, it isn't going to happen. People have different opinions, beliefs and lifestyles, that is how this America thing works.
The utopian dream has been attempted through history but it is always at the point of a gun, sword or spear. Humans are unique individuals we are not bees living in a collective directed by a queen. Peace is as close as it can get without somebody losing their rights.
Hundreds of millions have lost their lives in attempts to achieve the myth of utopia. It is always the beginning sales pitch for achieving power over the masses. Perhaps we are again treading on dangerous territory. I think we should just stick with the goal of learning to tolerate each other and live together in peace.
