two hundred fifty

THEN CAME BRONSON

 Micheal Parks in 1969 starred in a TV show that impacted me profoundly. A young guy setting out on a motorcycle with the theme, "Where ever I end up I guess". That struck such a cord with me I almost bought a motorcycle but even at that age realized I would never survive, I had too much of that speed thing.

Jim Bronson would find himself in a situation every week where he would save a life, put down a bully, solve a crime or change a life, but that is Hollywood. Actually a real journey has countless special moments. They may not be as dramatic as a television series but I do know I impacted a few lives along the way. Mine was certainly changed, I think that is the way this human to human thing should work.

I did buy a leather jacket and hat and took off a few times hitch hiking. My first few times I made all of the stupid mistakes but avoided the serial killers, but I did find and politely avoid a few creepy truck drivers. I remember so clearly being in the middle of Pennsylvania at 6 am trying to hitch a ride after sleeping under a truck on a piece of cardboard. It sounds like a nightmare but I had a smile on my face I'll never forget.

The middle of nowhere with only my whits is somehow soothing. I found the same feeling with a bicycle, a  motorcycle comes with a lot of limitations. People don't react the same to a motorcycle as they do a nut in the middle of nowhere on a bicycle. 

Living in Oregon the summers are filled with hundreds of guys my age taking epic journeys on very nice touring motorcycles. They travel longer distances from motel to motel avoiding the stress of leg power and primitive camping. I may someday do that but now I'll stick to my peddle bike.

On a bicycle there are things you just can't do. One of these is go fast and you can't go far, legs and lungs are the only motor you have. The weather and terrain rule your days. The slow slog puts you in contact with so many more people along the way.

If you go on Youtube you can watch a clip of this conversation. Jim Bronson has a conversation with a business guy going to work who is curious about what Jim was doing. He asked "were are you headed?", Jim answered "where ever I end up I guess". I have had the vary interaction with so many people who ask me the same question. 

The guy in the car seemed to be in awe if the free spirit of a young guy on an epic journey. It doesn't seem like much but to many people the thought of unfocused freedom thrills and terrifies them.

The call of the road is strong in me I have never ever been in a more perfect place then the middle of nowhere special. Each time I have fed this need, the need grows stronger. The older I get the more my eyes search the horizon longing to see what is over the hill and around the corner.

My previous post talked about my focus issues. What I have discovered I find serenity in the chaos of the bike lane. That and the feeling of freedom I can't imagine a more perfect place to be.

two hundred forty nine

Why would a grown man want to ride a heavy bicycle across America?

I have tried to understand my wondering need for a very long time. I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s like most kids wondering what it is all about. The political and cultural turmoil of war, the draft, civil rights, moon landings, Woodstock, television, muscle cars, girls and rock and roll set the back drop. 

I was the younger son of a blue collar family from a small Ohio town. As a vocation factories or farming was the choice most kids made. We got jobs, fast cars, raised some hell, fell in love, got married, bought a house, started a family and tried to figure it out like every other human on the planet.

We all have a path and a story I’ll tell you a little part of mine. After a rough and tumble free range childhood I was an average kid. However I was plagued with impulse control issues and a few what they now call learning disorders. Thank God I was not treated for any of these because I eventually learned to live with them and thrive.

I write in this blog in a way that I believe is helped by these “disorders”. It takes me twice as long but I believe it makes sense to the people reading in a way I still don’t understand. Perhaps it just fits in your head too.

I was a bully and I was bullied, I was shy but obnoxious, I hid while I was showing off and like most young boys under the influence of testosterone, thought my dad was an idiot, rebelled at every turn and howled at the moon. I somehow avoided arrest and survived muscle cars with only a broken leg but a few dead friends. We were living in a strange bubble trying to stay awake in a small town.

My dad eventually got smarter and years later I understood he had had every right to smother me in my sleep. I wrecked his cars, broke his tools and pretty much drove my parents to the very edge. I know I’m not the only one but I was pretty bad.

Being alone kept me out of trouble and being alone was very comforting. I have found over the years this is both good and bad, there has to be a balance. I’ll save you all of the psycho babble about my path to get some things into perspective. 

The bottom line is I’m sober for more than 30 years and I have a relationship with my higher power Jesus Christ. From the day I entered into a covenant with Him I have never felt alone. We talk but not often enough, I’m not everyone’s idea of a model Christian but I won’t plaster on a Jesus mask to make people happy. Over the decades of this relationship I have changed from the inside out so hiding that with a mask people can see around would be disingenuous. I am who I am and I am striving to be better every day.

Enough preachy stuff now back to the reason I ride a bicycle like I do……