three hundred two

 GOOD vs BAD

if it were only that simple.

There was a time you could tell the good guys from the bad guys, black or white hat, law enforcement or criminal, soldier or terrorist, preacher or drug lord and nun or prostitute. I know there are bad cops, soldiers, preachers and nuns but today if you watch entertainment media these are usually the bad guys.

I'll agree the old good vs bad plots get predictable and in a way boring. In the rebellious 60's the bad guys started to win and the good guys started losing. At first it was an interesting twist but eventually it became even more predictable. 

Today American flags are symbols of hate, preachers are perverts, being a virgin is a laugh line, Santa Claus is a serial killer, war veterans are deranged and police officers are all corrupt.

This began in movies and television and soon oozed into news opinion. Virtue is not expected or valued, in fact it is mocked as old fashioned or conservative. 

I've noticed popular shows like Breaking Bad, Ray Donavan, Dexter and Deadwood have added a new twist. There are no good guys, everyone is compromised. Half way through we realize we are rooting for the hero of the story but they are a drug dealer, murderer or thief.

DEADWOOD

RAY DONAVAN 

DEXTER

BREAKING BAD

Over the decades the value of virtue or any sense of shame have been eroded. It is more then a sense of right and wrong, it is the idea that right and wrong no longer matters.

Diverting responsibility, a sense of entitlement, justified envy and the right to feed our cravings is deemed normal. Once these basic principles have been devalued we drift further towards tyranny or anarchy. 

The bar has been lowered by a double standard justus system, corrupt government, bias media and a move away from the acknowledgment of God.

This has not only effected the individual but it has effected us as a free nation. It is assumed that all of our leaders are tarnished and the few that are practicing virtue are mocked or discounted. We have lost our heroes, at least the virtuous ones.

John Adams was one of the signers of the Constitution. He had a couple quotes I have found insightful.

The turmoil around the world and domestically can become overwhelming. It is not only electing virtuous leaders, passing responsible bills, fairly enforcing laws, reasonable regulation, wise military actions or having informed elections that will right the ship, it is the hearts of the people. 

I may sound old-fashioned or naive but an acknowledgment of God and a sense of virtue must be restored before it is too late. I see a pendulum swing in our country. 

Not Republican or Democrat, left or right, liberal or conservative, pro or con, man or woman but a turning back to the basic foundation of freedom and liberty, virtue. Virtue is a yielding to our conscience to  do the right thing when no one is looking. 

I'm just a guy on a bicycle but observing the people of this amazing country over the miles has taught me not to discount the love for freedom and liberty of it's people. I do not lose hope because I have met the American people.

Most organizations or movements are pulled along by a very small percentage of the people involved. Our country was established and founded by a very small minority at first. It is always possible for things to change no matter where it begins. It is already beginning in the hearts of virtuous people who yearn to remain free, it is contagious.

With this and with God's blessing tomorrow will be a brighter day. 

three hundred one

INFORMATION OVERLOAD

If you have read my blog you know I'm not a fan of todays media. I'm also disappointed when people blindly settle for whatever a media outlet says and regards it as the definitive truth. 

Our media in America has a constitutionally protected charge to be our critical eyes and ears on government. They claim to do in-depth investigation and research. They claim to bring us the most current and accurate information. 

They claim to witness wars, natural disasters, catastrophic accidents, crime and scandals, but it has been revealed that they sometimes never leave the office. This is all to be without bias, agenda or omission. 

1950's DRAGNET Sargent Joe Friday

The days of the trusted news anchor with great hair, reading the days events into our living rooms are over. My parents believed every word these trusted individuals said but history has revealed that even they had clear biases. 

Today the new version of these overpaid beautiful people have revealed their biases and at times a complete lack of ethics. They don't even try to hide it because most think the consumer is unable to hold the correct opinion so they shape what we hear "for our own good".

One reason for this is the corporate nature of news outlets. Being paid millions by a large corporation demands loyalty to the interests of that corporation, it may not be an official agreement it is just human nature. 

If you desire success, a luxurious lifestyle and enjoy being one of the cool kids more power to you but claiming your first interest is integrity and truth is the height of hypocrisy. 

Jet to your summer homes, give yourselves awards, live in your bubble but don't underestimate the average consumer. 

The world wide web isn't the Wild West as it was in the beginning. There are powers trying to control the flow of information but the Genie is out of the bottle. With a little effort and a desire to find information the truth is still out there.

There are always idealistic tech savvy truth tellers willing to risk persecution to report the truth. Over time some will be corrupted by fame, money and power, some will yield to pressure and go away but a few will endure and stay devoted to the truth no matter the sacrifice. That too is human nature.

The key is the curiosity and willingness of the consumer. We have the tools, we have access and an endless amount of information. The key is developing the ability to discern what the truth really is.

It is easier to blindly trust a few sources but I suggest trust no-one, not even me. Many sources may have reliable information but most have an agenda that ranges from a slight slant to out right lies.

Omission is the most deceptive because their defense is we didn't lie we just didn't report on it. This is the most commonly practiced tactic today. If a news outlet does report on it it can be characterized as a fringe conspiracy. Facts aren't up to a popular vote.  

I trust a few principles. I believe the truth will hold up under scrutiny. Test everything, beat it up and challenge it, if it is true it will hold up. If not you will know it is not true.

Read everything, find those side stories that only a few are reporting. If they are attacking a person or organization for their bias, intelligence or character, perhaps they don't want you to hear what they have to say.

Is the argument fact based or emotional? Avoid the so called self proclaimed "fact checking" organizations, they are all corrupted. Be your own fact checker. Read the bill, speech, hearing, interview, report, study or video. You are your best "fact checker".

 Avoid the silly school yard adolescent name calling nonsense it is always a distraction. 

If they are all talking about it look for the things they aren't talking about. The media can be like a slight of hand magician, they use the art of distraction to hide things they don't want you to see.

First you need to ask yourself the question, do I want to know what is actually true or do I want to settle for my truth or what I want to be true. 

No matter what they say there is not a color wheel of truths, truth is truth. I may not like it but whatever it is I want to know.  

I know, this is a bicycle blog. I have been distracted lately with world and national events. When I get frustrated and overwhelmed I find a quiet place and focus on the amazing people I have met along the way.

They were average Americans doing the deal everyday, building something, raising a family, defending the innocent and enforcing the laws. They haul our goods, build our cars, clean our messes and prepare our food. They deserve the truth.

Unfortunately the unwashed are considered incapable of grasping the wisdom they are offering. If it were just a matter of arrogance that is fine but some want to control, subjugate and suppress with the use of propaganda. Then they wonder why we don't trust them. 

I do not think this will change but we can change how we consume news and shape our own opinions.

I was once told to have an opinion but make sure it's my own opinion not someone else's.

Okay, I'm finished with my rant. The weather is changing in Oregon. I have been walking seven miles per day. I'm losing weight, stretching and loosening up my muscles and joints. Mostly I'm trying to ignore my aches and pains and push forward trying not to feel 70. The next couple of weeks the bicycle is coming out and a full on slog to get my bicycle mojo back begins.

three hundred

 FAT AND HAPPY....

THE AMERICAN DREAM?

My parents were part of possibly the last generation that saved their money to buy things. Today we don't look in our savings account, that is if we even have one, instead we check our credit line. 

My parents were shaped by the depression and the Second World War. After the war, the returning soldiers got married and began to build the American dream. 

My Dad built the small house I was raised in. He worked full time as a machinist, rented a room from a relative and spent his off time salvaging materials from a two story house he had contracted to demolish to make room for the new high school. 

He saved everything, lumber, windows, nails, doors and whatever he could reuse to build our tiny house. He did all of this with the help of an eccentric local farmer named Drexel Harris. 

Drexel still farmed with horses so my Dad scooped out the tiny basement and graded the hillside lot using his horses. He built the house himself as he got the money and never borrowed a dime.

I'm one of the sixties rebels who rebelled and questioned the social and moral norms. Music, fast cars and the sexual revolution, that I am grateful I missed, and a new way to feed our impulsive wants, revolving credit. 

Living up to and beyond our means with a line of credit was becoming normal. I was responsible in the beginning but later on I dabbled in high interest credit card debt. This was partly because of circumstances but for decades I lived under a cloud of these plastic taskmasters.

I have righted the ship and have things under control but I still don't own a home or anything building equity. I do however have an excellent 816 credit rating (whatever that means) and a long line of credit waiting in the shaddows for another weak moment. 

One thing I have learned, these words are powerful. Wants and needs are different. The line between meeting our needs or feeding our appitites and wants has become blurred. Marketing has convinced us to feed these desires because we deserve them, we need to keep up our image or the draw of the latest shiny object.

I fought with my parents over this issue like most kids. I bought new cars, had the latest toys and refused to live by a budget. I paid my bills but investments and compounding interest would have ment a very comfortable retirement.

"I have enough" and "simplify, simplify, simplify" have been a guiding principle for much of my life. I have learned to be creative with what I have, avoid giving a damn what the cool kids think and living below my means.

My bike trips have taught me the adventure gets better when I have less money to spend. I would not camp as often or cook as much if I could stay in nice motels, eat in restaurants and get massages. 

Connecting with people is now my goal so asking for permission from a farmer to camp in a pasture or asking the local police about a safe place where they "don't look" is much more interesting then negotiating with a motel office employee.

I have shared meals with hungry strangers along the road. We usually combine whatever ingredients we have to create a unique hobo stew. I love that I have a humble bicycle rig. I have learned what I really need and what I really don't need.

Perhaps this has nothing to do with how smart or wise I am it is how this mode of travel has made me learn this. My mistakes have forced me to change, I take no credit for this other then my initial selfcentered mistakes.

The Natural

The only good thing about this movie was this quote: "We all have two lives, the one you learn with and the one you live". 

I doubt I have a unique story. This younger generation is living the life they will learn with and hopefully they will move on to the life they will live. I'm just grateful I survived my stupid past.

If you can keep wealth in perspective I admire you. Many if not most have learned these things the easy way. Unfortunately that has never been my style.

two hundred ninety nine

 

THE BIG LEBOWSKI

The Big Lebowski is a cult classic that came out in 1998. The laid back lead character "The Dude" Jeff Bridges captured the hearts of many.

His irreverent character had no cause, agenda or need to change the world. Credence, Black Russians and candle light bubble baths with good weed were his simple pleasures but bowling was his religion.

I grew up in the stay cool and never let them see you sweat generation so I could relate to his character. He may not have been aware of his poor social skills but one thing for sure he really didn't care. 

He didn't go out of his way to be obnoxious or rude he simply existed in his own world. He didn't seek confrontation other then hating the Eagles and demanding justice for his piss stained rug. 

He was defiant and sarcastic in the midst of an interrogation swirly or getting his private parts nibbled by a wild nihilist attack Ferret.

The Dude faced a series of bazar scenes and circumstances filled with a cast of outrageous characters. Each new wrong turn threatened to "chill his buzz" but he moved forward with the bad advice of his psychotic friends. When things got too overwhelming they took refuge in the temple of bowling.

(LINK)         (LINK)

Going with the flow, doing your own thing or feeling the vibe is summed up in one phrase, the Dude abides. 

The Dude had a sense of honor and showed loyalty to his friends. The movie does not explain how they became friends but I assume it had something to do with their bowling averages.

I don't recommend his lifestyle but I can relate to his place in the theater of life. Everyone plays a part but I am not the director or critic, I'm just part of the audience. The Dude lived in the moment as a casual observer of the people and events around him.

We do need to be disciplined and except responsibility but we all need a little "Dude" in our lives. Sometimes we just need to let life flow over us, feel the vibe or live in the moment.

Life is a trip full of constantly changing circumstances with a cast of  outrageous characters. The reality is we can't change circumstances or people. You can walk your own path, live your own values and be loyal to your friends. 

The Dude was by no means a perfect role model but he did have one thing right, "the Dude abides" and if all else fails, go bowling. 

Take breaks, enjoy simple pleasures and just be. If life gets too crazy go bowling or that place you find refuge. 

I ride my bike.

two hundred ninety eight

THIS IS SPINAL TAP

The spandex hair bands in the 80's were a unique phenomena. The epic movie "This Is Spinal Tap", is a mockumentory about one of the loudest heavy metal English bands of that era. 

Each time I watch it, I find more and more comedic nuggets. This is one of the most famous lines that has found its way into todays culture. 

Nigel Tufnel, lead guitar player while giving a tour of the bands equipment says"You see our amplifiers and guitars all go to 11, you see that is one more then 10".  

(link)

The movie captures the rock and roll lifestyle and rock band drama were captured perfectly. These guys had a passion to do something epic. They were rock gods on a Saturday night, they had ventured out of the box to chase a dream.

Living and loving at full volume has been a phrase I've used for many years. I know being excited like a kid on Christmas morning everyday is just not realistic but I do jump around on the furniture when I buy a new pair of sneakers.

When strangers ask how I'm doing I say "I'm Livin large and livin the dream". This always brings a laugh and a conversation. 

If a close friend asks that question it is different, somedays life kinda sucks so I have learned to say it out loud. After that acknowledgment I move on to realizing it is my perseption of things that actually sucks. After a mutual laugh I'm back on track again. Living life at 11 is a choice plus it is "one more then 10". 

Do I choose to see a sunset or bitch because it's getting dark? In a Restaurant do I complain about the service and the prices or do I have a conversation with the person I'm with? 

It is the difference between eating and dining. Eating is a focus on food with a side of conversation, dining is a focus on conversation while enjoying food. 

Human interaction feeds our heart and soul while food feeds our stomach. Both are nessesary and should be enjoyed.

Climbing a mountain, facing a headwind, days in the rain or even a flat tire can be enjoyed if you have the right perspective. A day of bitching and moaning never got me over a mountain, a single extra mile, kept me dry or fixed a flat tire. 

These things are not 11 material but I can manage an 8 or 9. I'm that nut climbing a 6% grade mountain pass with a stupid grin on my face. People actually ask me why the hell am I smiling aren't you tired? I'm exhausted but I'm exactly where I want to be doing exactly what I want to do, it's perfect.

If you find that place or thing, do it with all of your might, life is way too short to bitch and grumble it away.

I found two perfect places that I fit, one is on my bicycle in the middle of nowhere. This is my 11.....that is one more than 10. 

two hundred ninety seven

MORNING RANT

To the best of my ability I try to say exactly what I mean. Yes I'm a hypocrite at times, I'm human, but when it is pointed out I own it. 

My defects of character are a moving target, I claim progress not perfection. In my arguments I think about the words I use. 

I do this because my ability to manipulate is the character defect I hate the most. I can turn on my BS machine to get my way and make you believe it is your idea. I have and ability to charm my way out of problems and avoid consequences. 

In my dark past I used whatever it took to get my way and keep my"nice guy" image. I am profoundly ashamed of my past behavior. This is a vital part of my journey to find serenity. 

After 31 years of sobriety turning on my BS power to manipulate others feels unnatural but manipulating myself is much harder to detect. That is why I rely on other recovering friends to call me out on this.

One upside of this character defect is the ability to see these tactics in others. I value straight talk even if I don't agree with what is said. Clarity is more important then agreeing, but to debate, discuss or argue seems to be a lost art. 

Any level of discussion seems to derail quickly. The focus on winning a   debate by discrediting or demeaning the opponent has taken the place of arguing with facts or ideas.

Skin color, sex or sexual preference, age, profession, education, accent, religious belief or non belief, political affiliation or philosophy, accent, social standing or any perceived flaw is fair game.

The search to find a perceived flaw to discredit the person is common today. Everyone says something I agree with and something I disagree with. The all or nothing tactic is simply a cheap manipulative tool. 

One misspoken word, wrong action or opinion no matter how long ago or the circumstance, whether it is true or not is used to cancel an entire person. I thought the Puritans were a tough crowd but compared to the "cancel culture mob" they seem reasonable.

Guilt by association is another all too common tactic. Find or create a member of any group that has an extreme opinion or looks funny to taint the entire group or movement. No real facts are required just a sound bite or picture and a caption. Truth has little to do with this just winning at all cost matters.

Todays conversations focus on implied associations, defining or redefining words and assigning motives to ideas.  

Debate today is more of a talking point, discrediting and insult war, ideas and facts need not apply. Selective or made up"Facts" and Science" are used as clubs, all past behavior is fair game and victim status is a wild card. 

Occasionally I find someone who actually wants to learn something. They are open to new ideas, they want to know more facts and entertain the option to change their mind. Unfortunately they are just sitting ducks for the skilled insult artist disguised as leaders, experts or scholars.

Navigating the "woke" minefield, never admitting wrong and adopting the latest fashionable outrage or guilt. An honest question, opinion or misdirected attitude can cause you to lose a job, career, friends and livelihood.

I'm retired now and don't have to lose sleep over being politically correct. I have this blog to talk about my ideas. It is as political as I get. My personal politics are personal but if you want to know, ask me.

Please please please don't imply my motives, redefine my words or assign me to a group. I would love to hear what YOU think so I won't do those things to you.

two hundred ninety six

So this is this it?

The average expected human lifespan has increased over the last century and a half and quite dramatically over the past 70 years.

Before this an average life expectancy of 26 to 35 years was the norm. Plagues, poor sanitation, famine, wars, natural disasters, accidents, violence, low child mortality, a lack of medicines, medical knowledge and availability. 

In prehistoric times hunting and gathering filled their short lives. Food, clothing, shelter and protection were the main focus. Fighting the elements, animals, insects, disease, famine and other humans was all consuming. This example of art was rare because day to day survival took precedent. 

Death was so much a part of life all through ancient history. Mercy was defined as a quick death with minimal suffering. Families lost 214 children out of a thousand in 1880, today it is considered extremely high at 6 out of a thousand.  

Even with the development of modern weaponry the majority of  casualties in all recorded wars has been spears, swords, arrows and clubs. A wound was usually fatal because of infection and poor medical treatment. 

Travel by land and sea was extremely dangerous. Hundreds of millions died doing what today is considered safe and normal.

The availability of food in first world countries has produced new modern life threatening problems, obesity, diabetes and other health issues. There are still starving people in parts of the world but even the poorest in America have access to an abundance of food and medical care. 

There are many Americans who have no clue where or how their food is produced. They live in safe communities, drive safe cars, fly in safe planes and have access to modern medicine.

There are exceptions but we live in amazing times. The internet and mapping the gene-gnome have been giant strides but the availability of clean water and sanitation have had the largest impact on increasing life expectancy.

We now face an even more ominous problem. What are we doing with our extended lifespans? What do we do with our leisure time? What do we do with our wealth? 

I grew up near Amish and Mennonite communities, their lifestyle confuses many people. They have a central theme, dependance on the community and connection to the land. They do this by limiting the use of technology and focus on reliance on family, neighbors and God.

This is an extreme example as to how people choose to live out their lives. There are countless other ways to live but far too many submerge themselves in entertainment and self indulgence. Sadly their focus on comfort and pleasure can cause them to miss their lives completely.

Psychiatrist, political commentator and syndicated columnist Charles Krauthammer wrote several best selling books and a syndicated column in 400 outlets. His last two books "The Point Of It All" and "Things That Matter" were his most important to me.

Charles was limited physically from a spinal accident in his youth and battled cancer that eventually took his life. As he faced death over his last years his writing turned to what he thought was important. These books plus the book of Ecclesiastes got me thinking about my own life.

Do I take my own life for granted? How can I live it fully and what does that even mean? Does my life matter, do I matter? What happens after I'm dead? Is this it? These questions have occupied the thoughts of every living human since the beginning of time.

People have worshiped the elements, the earth and powerful people. Others have searched for God and the meaning of life. Today artificial intelligence, technology and space exploration has become it's own religion. 

The fitness and health craze have become another form of religion. Health and fitness are important but worshiping our bodies is a form of  Narcissism. 

Narcissism named for Narcissus, a figure from Greek mythology who was so impeccably handsome that he fell in love with his own image in a pool of water, the original selfie.

The question today is; am I preserving my life and saving life for a rainy day, or am I living it?

We may have the worst of times because we can become complacent and distracted. Did we lose the sense of urgency to live a life that matters?

I don't think a short life is less meaningful then a long life. Compared to the thousands or billions of years lives have been lived there is little difference between 26 years and 86 years. The only difference may be the urgency to answer the eternal questions.

I personally do not believe this is all that there is. If I believed this was it what would be the point of right and wrong. I don't worship a score keeping God, I worship a God who says I am made in his image.

I don't know if that means arms and legs, fingers and toes or eyes and ears. This could be it but what I have found he means he has the same needs as I do, a need to love and be loved.

I trust he is good for his word not just that he exists. He said if I enter into his covenant and strive to keep my end of it I can be with him forever. I have no idea how that happens but I trust his word because he has always kept his promises by honoring his covenants throughout history.

I put my trust in this particular verse along with many others.

Jude 1:24 To him who is able to keep you (me) from stumbling and present you (me) before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy---

The baseball movie "The Natural" had a line about living two lives. "The life we learn with and the life we live with after that", I think I'm in the learning one right now.

If you are honest with yourself there is a question you must answer. Drowning it out or ignoring it takes it's toll. It is the most nagging question that is rarely discussed. 

Sorry if I have pointed at the big fat smelly elephant taking a steaming dump in the middle of the room.

Finish your organic smoothy, climb off of your Peloton and go out and live your life, you have some questions to answer.

two hundred ninety five

 Preconceived Notions

To sum up my bicycle adventures in one simple phrase; I traveled through the world around me to challenge my preconceived notions.

I have spent my life being curious. I wondered how things work, how plants grow and how animals behave. I questioned what was over the horizon, under the water or up in the sky. Later I began the most interesting adventure, people.

Not only did I want to experience new places, different climates, plants, geography, foods, lifestyles and people, I wanted to actually see how they really were. I knew my ideas were shaped by movies, television, the news and others opinions. I always suspected these people, places and things would not be what I expected.

I have never been to war so I have no idea what it is like. There are many movies, TV shows and books that portray war but until it is actually experienced no one can truly grasp the reality.

It may be terminal illness, crime victim, prison or arrest, near death or religious experience, child birth, death of a child or spouse, discrimination, bullying, military service, treatment rehab, serious accident or any unique human event be it grief, joy, exhilaration or trauma. No one knows what it is like to be a policeman, middle child, garbage man, CEO and so on unless they actually are one. We get into trouble when we claim to or think we know. 

Today many people claim to know much more then they can possibly know. The cock sure attitudes of politicians, media personalities and celebrities amazes me. 

Just because you watched a movie or starred in one doesn't make you an expert. Claiming to know how other people think, what they need and how they should live is unfortunately way too common today. In fact it is rarely questioned. In many circles these bias and uninformed opinions are valued and often directly quoted.

I try to take an adventure everyday. The input I can get through all forms of media be it political, religious or a social perspective has an underlying bias. That can't be avoided, is simply human nature. It can be used to manipulate and control or it can just be a bias they are not even aware they have.

I do not criticize people because most don't even know. I do get disappointed when they do know better or are not curious enough to ask an honest question. It is up to us to ask these questions.

I am not more wise or noble, I have had mentors stir this desire that was in me. I believe it is in everyone to want to know what is real and true but many have settled. They allow others to shape their thoughts and opinions because it is easy.

The vehicle I chose to take on these physical adventures was primitive. I chose a bicycle because it is disarming and a curiosity. I was not a threat because it was unconventional. People were curious so it opens doors to conversations. These people were where they lived.

If it was a rich business owner in Maine, a bridge painter in Schenectady New York, pig farmer in Iowa or fisherman in North Carolina, it was a place to learn.

Listening is something I do but I could always improve on but I try to shut up and let other people talk. The way I do it is ask a question like an interviewer. I want to know what people think. They usually think I'm a rock star because of my mode of travel so I get past that as quickly as possible and get them to talk.

I don't debate but I do share opinions. The unwritten rule of never talking about politics or religion is BS. The politics thing is much less important then sharing my faith. It is never my goal to do this but to take it completely off of the table is wrong in my opinion.

I share what guides me and gives me peace and joy. I rarely quote scripture and I totally avoid speaking in Christian-eze. 

Politics is a mine field today so I don't initiate those conversations. I will talk generally about my political philosophy. Avoiding any party affiliation can allow the conversation to go deeper. I want to have conversations not win arguments. 

The tactics today are to pigeon hole everyone into a political tribe. If I do talk politics I want to know what YOU think not what your political party thinks. 

Realizing I don't know as much as I think comes with age. The older I get the more I reluctantly realize this. Interacting with another human being is a unique experience because each human being is unique. 

I personally don't think there is as much prejudice, hatred, bigotry and racism as it is portrayed today. Not that these do not exist, I just think from my experience we all suffer from preconceived notions about each other.

These divisions are an advantage to those who want people divided. They say they want unity but many are simply lying.

I usually talk about the "elephant in the room". It gets me in trouble sometimes but I'm willing to risk it. I believe from my investigation over the years people of all backgrounds haven't opened themselves up to take an honest look at the individual not the group.

Conversations and interactions are healing, I have seen it and have experienced it. Leaders, politicians and laws won't solve this and usually make things worse. The curious individual choosing to bypass the BS and interact with another curious individual is the only real chance we have of healing these divisions.

I know I got preachy but this is at the heart of what I learned on my bicycle. This country is made up of 340 million individuals. I haven't interacted with them all but I have interacted with many. 

Experiment with this, challenge your preconceived notions in your next conversation. Talk about something real, love, hope, fears, worries, dreams and questions. Listen more then you talk, I'm working on that one. 

Set aside your preconceived notions and hopefully let the healing begin. It comes slow but the more people interact the more the understand they share very common human traits that go beyond, race, politics, economic status or religion. 

Build bridges first then go for the hard stuff. Mankind will heal from the bottom up, not the top down.

After that go ride your bike........

two hundred ninety four

 BAG FULL OF ROCKS....

Joe Pesci and Brandon Fraser star in the 1994 movie With Honors. A story about a top academic student with a promising career and a homeless man with some unorthodox wisdom.

Though the two get off on the wrong foot, they become close friends. It is a funny and touching story about a brilliant young student and an unlikely mentor who teaches the young student some important life lessons.

One that struck me was his bag full of rocks he called his life. Each time he experienced a significant event in his life he would pick up a pebble to remember it. Each rock in the bag represented a specific memory. 

One was a good night of sleep, one was that perfect woman and so on. When he held and rubbed one of the rocks he would feel like he was there again. Once the rock was back in the bag he couldn't remember or feel it.

I think it was his way of living his life fully. As he picked a rock he could fully feel the heart break, joy, sadness, loss, pride, guilt, shame, satisfaction, serenity, triumph, disappointment or love. Once he returned the rock to the bag he could fully focus on the present and didn't have to feel his whole life at once. 

This principle is not that uncommon. A ring or neckless, a picture or letter, a song or a special scent, these all trigger strong memories and emotions. Some of these could be wonderful and some horrible. 

I try to use the idea of returning the rocks or memories to the bag. This helps me feel everything more clearly. If I see my life as a whole the more dramatic events dominate and I'm unable to feel the meaningful small moments. 

I don't want to completely forget any moment of my life, but some are so painful they dominate my thoughts and hinder my ability to love and be loved. Having a place to store them safely until a proper time to feel them is a powerful idea.

As a man, stuffing thoughts and emotions or trying to completely forget them is a way of life, but this has not been my best thinking. Experiencing, owning or processing is vital to good mental health.

Feeling things fully is really hard. I fear never being able to stop if I turn on my emotions fully. I will find that proper place and person to share them with one day.

The proper time and place for this process is also vital. The bag of rocks method allows me to choose the time and place.

I can share these with other people to help them. I can feel the tearful heart ache in private. I can feel the love and joy during down times. Each memory is cherished because it is my life, warts and all.

My rocks have come in many forms. Life is like a long bike tour, even the most stressful days become cherished memories. The longer I live the more I feel connections especially the ones that can't be broken.

two hundred ninety three

Dreaming 

The memories of the endless miles still visit my dreams even years later. Usually in my daydreams but on occasion during those twilight dreams I have just before I wake. 

I don't know the location, the day, the year or even the trip. I do remember every detail of the faces, voices and smiles. The conversations, the questions and the kindness. 

There are vivid flashes of breathtaking views, smells, flavors and feelings. The night sky, sunset and sunrise. The vistas, small towns, cities, hot desert highways and morning dew. 

The smell of rain, freshly cut fields, the ocean, saw mills, dairy farms, plowed fields, BBQ and flowers. 

The food was always a sensual experience. My body craved fuel so I salivated even at the thought of Top Ramen. After a few hard hot days a cheeseburger, fries and milkshake in a diner was overwhelming. It was a time to stuff my face, I think that was also in Ecclesiastes.

The endless number of campsites are a blur but I still remember the sounds of traffic, crickets, tree frogs, coyotes, dogs, water falls, ocean waves, thunder, rain, wind and absolute silence. The rush of waking to wonder where in the hell I was and the search for coffee and a bathroom.

Motels were usually modest and sometimes sub-modest. I stayed in some sketchy places but they were castles compared to curling up under my tent rain fly behind a guard rail along a busy highway. The showers, clean sheets, fresh shave, sleeping naked, fresh coffee, waffles, eggs, bacon and sticky bun breakfasts. 

I washed my clothes and dried my tent and bedding. I recharged my phone batteries, watched a little television and repacked my bike so I could roll out early.

I got on the road early because I skipped the usual morning rituals, breaking camp, repacking my bike, finding coffee and a bathroom. Because of the early start these were usually 100 mile plus days. I also remember my celebratory half gallon of vanilla ice-cream after a big mileage day.

In spite of the sweat, dirt, body oder, aches, pains, blisters, wind and sun burn, insect bites and traffic stress. I embraced all of it, I was happy.

The road is a mistress, a strong and difficult task master. I am unable to resist its call and have realized I foolishly once thought I can control it. However the road is in charge I can only surrender to it and live in the stress of it. 

I thrive in this stress and embrace it's challenges. The road tests me to my limits and beyond. Like the sea, the highway must be respected and at times feared, and like the sailor, I can't resist it's call.

Many people find this foolishness but in the chaos of the bike lane I find serenity. 

I am rewarded with the feeling of satisfaction. I'm being led on an adventure that is way out of my comfort zone. That is the place real life happens.

On the road there are no shortcuts, I must continue on pushing my body past its limits. I have achieved things I could never imagine.  

I could go on and on about this because the memories of these bicycle journeys begin to flood in as I write. I have felt this unwavering and demanding strength only once before.